I received an emergency call through the answering service while I was attending a parade with my family. An office tenant was very upset and demanded to speak with me. Tenant: Why are the doors to the office building locked? This is unacceptable! Me: It’s July 4th. The building is closed for the holiday. Tenant: … Continue reading Happy Holidays!
While helping a tenant select new paint colors for his office. Tenant: This one is nice. What is it called? Me: Fresh Eggplant. Tenant: What? Why would they call it that? It’s not white. It’s purple! Me: Well, it’s a dark purple kinda like an eggplant. Tenant: Do I look stupid to you? Eggs are… Continue reading Do I look stupid?
Tenant owes many months of rent. Tenant is also married to my boss’s daughter. Daughter tells my boss that my accounting records are totally screwed up and demands a meeting to straighten me out. I go to the tenant’s office for the straightening-out meeting. Daughter is really angry! She tells me she’s paid the rent… Continue reading Magic Accounting
Someone was screaming into the phone the moment I picked up the call. Tenant: I’M NOT PAYING RENT UNTIL YOU FIX THIS HORRIBLE SMELL IN MY OFFICE! Me: What? What’s wrong? Who is this? Tenant: I’M NOT DOING YOUR JOB FOR YOU! :::hangs up on me::::
I was helping a tenant select a new paint color for his office. Before I could place any orders for materials I needed the tenant to sign off on his choice of paint color. Me: Here you go, just need you to sign here to approve the paint and we’ll get the work scheduled for… Continue reading Dangerous Robot!
Waiting in the courtroom hallway for an eviction hearing. Tenant: You think just because we’re here that you can judge me? Me: I’m not judging you. I’m just here doing my job. Tenant: That’s right! You can’t judge me. Me: Yep. That’s the judge’s job, not mine. Tenant: What? Me: The judge. In the courtroom.… Continue reading Judge not lest ye be judged
Angry person on phone: I’m going to report you to the city for not fixing my garage door! You are the worst manager we’ve ever had! Me: I’ve told you twice already. I don’t manage your condo! You’re calling the wrong management company. We don’t even handle residential property. Angry person: You’ll say anything to… Continue reading You are the worst manager we have ever had!
A medical office tenant decided to strip and refinish the wood floors in his office in the middle of a week day…inside a multi-story office building filled with other businesses and people. The fumes filled the building and the smell was overwhelming. I immediately stopped him from working and told him that he had to… Continue reading You are not an expert!
Tenant: Why did you send these legal papers to me? Me: It’s for unpaid rent. You haven’t paid the rent. Tenant: I’m very busy! I don’t have time for this! I can’t believe you expect me to stop everything and pay the rent! This is crazy!
Me: You can’t smoke in your office. Tenant: Why? Me: It’s in your lease and it’s against the law. Tenant: For reals? Later I find the same tenant smoking in the stairwell. Me: You can’t smoke in the stairway. Tenant: But you won’t let me smoke in my office!
You'll Never Rent In This Town Again! 